last days in Nebraska

Today is my last full day in Nebraska.  The house is quiet right now, which is the only reason I am spending any time on the computer!  I was journaling a bit earlier this morning a few thoughts on leaving and thought I would share a few.

 I feel very sad right now about leaving, and I really have no idea how this transition is going to go.  The closest thing I have done to this was going to the Dominican Republic (for a mere 4 months.. that looks like nothing now!).  The first few days I spent in the DR were very miserable.  I was homesick, I missed my family and friends, and I was not feeling good about my decision to go there.  It is amazing to me how far I have come since that time.  If you had asked me then, I never would have predicted that my life would be quite where it is.  Of course, that's probably true about most of us!  Still, I am so grateful to all the people whose influence led me here (though maybe my parents would like to have a word with you.. just kidding, they led me here, too!).

A good thing about transitions like these is that they remind me how lucky I am to have the family I do!  I love you all so much.  I am sad to leave, excited to go, and trusting about everything in between.

in a trustful time

During the past year I preached so often about the importance of leaving your comfort zone and seeking discomfort.  I claimed utmost willingness to seek change and growth when I become comfortable.  Well, it seems as though I forgot how painful and difficult that process can actually be.  Leaving Creighton, preparing to say goodbye to family and friends, thinking about new housemates and coworkers, preparing mentally and logistically for Peru... it is a lot.  Upon my remark that I am in a stressful time, Fr. Gillick quickly corrected me.  "Don't say stress," he told me.  "Say trust."

So, here I am, in a trusting time.  Trusting that the clothes and shoes I bring to Peru will be right.  Trusting that my friends won't forget me.  Trusting that my family will remain supportive through it all.  Trusting that my new housemates will approve of me.  Trusting that God will work through me and through those around me in Peru to promote love and peace.

Preparations are coming along.  I'm now safely immune to yellow fever, and thanks to my lovely doctor, am aware that I should be careful crossing the roads (because she's not sure if cars stop for pedestrians in Peru) and avoid going outside when the mosquitoes are biting.  Her intentions were good, though.  I've been reading preparatory materials for orientation, including articles about simplicity, community, and the spirituality of the Sisters of Charity of the Incarnate Word.  I will try to share more about that during orientation when we learn more, but I am really enjoying what I'm reading so far.  I'm also getting ready to start packing... I've started in my head, and I went to the store to stock up on some items that might be harder to get in Peru, but I haven't actually opened the suitcase yet.  Soon.

I am getting nervous about leaving but as Fr. Gillick says (yes, another piece of his wisdom), leaving and grieving lead to receiving.  Leaving and grieving is difficult, but it is a necessary component of moving out of the comfort and toward the unknown, where God's grace through the love and presence of other human beings is truly received.

beginnings

Welcome to my new blog! A brief post about what I'm doing right now...

I'm currently at home in Dodge, in a sort of limbo between Creighton and Peru. On August 1, I'll be heading to San Antonio for orientation before flying to Peru around August 23th. I'll be spending 2 years in Chimbote, Peru as a missionary with Incarnate Word Missionaries. I'm patiently awaiting a packet of information from IWM... when that comes, I'll really start thinking about preparations, packing, etc., and offer a better reflection on my thoughts thus far!

I'm currently reading a collection of writings by Dorothy Day, so I'll let her words serve as my inspiration...

"Let reform come through love of God only, and from that love of God, love of each other..."
-Dorothy Day